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[29 Nov 2009|09:33pm] |
Honestly, I am absolutely miserable right now.
I am eight months pregnant and huge. I am losing my mucous plug. My boobs are leaky. Contractions sometimes wake me up at night if I am not already awake from peeing ten million times. And to top all of this off: My throat feels like fire, I can't breath out of my nose, and my head weighs approximately 30 pounds.
Thank you.
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[10 Nov 2009|09:01pm] |
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I am so excited about my baby shower this Saturday!
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[15 Oct 2009|06:27am] |
I am up so early! I hate it. I just want to crawl back into bed and snuggle up with myself.
I ordered my baby crib yesterday. I am so excited about it.
This is what it looks like, except it's in black.
I also am trying to decide between two different crib bedding sets. I keep asking Cody for his opinion but all that he cares about is getting the stroller and car seat that he wants for the baby. Which is pretty hilarious to me. He is always like, "I can't be hauling around something girly all of the time." I guess that he just doesn't get the fact that we are HAVING A GIRL. Not that I am obsessed with pink, or anything. In all actuality I am trying to avoid pink as much as possible.
In other news that is not baby related--
I am so glad to have a day off after working over a week straight. It feels nice knowing that I can just relax all day and not worry about anything.
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[08 Oct 2009|01:36pm] |
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Right now I am so exhausted for some reason. I spent the morning grocery shopping and watching A Baby Story. I swear it's like I am those babies mothers because I cry all the time. It's probably just my hormones though. Who knows. I am crazy and just seriously can't wait until Sofie pops out and shows her beautiful head.
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[02 Oct 2009|06:47am] |
I am eating Fiber One cereal at six forty seven in the morning with a banana. How old of me.
So I am having a baby girl. And I'm pretty siked about this. I can't wait until she is actually here. Hopefully she has some hairs on her head.
Anyway. I have to work this morning. FML. Seriously. This job was just supposed to be a few hours during the week and has turned into long shifts with my feet swelling to unimaginable sizes.
Uh. FML.
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[24 Sep 2009|12:54pm] |
It's crazy to think that it's already October. I will have my baby in JANUARY. It's crazy/retarded/scary but exciting all at the same time. I never believed people when they would tell me to enjoy my youth. It seems like after I hit eightteen the fast forward button has been mashed down and everything is going so quickly. It's insane and so much has changed but I really like the direction that everything is flying in.
The baby is kicking me all of the time now. We didn't get to find out what the sex was at the last ultrasound because it was cross legged and curled up with its hands over its face. Luckily I am getting another ultrasound on Tuesday so it's kind of like a second chance.
I don't really care what it is anymore. Everyone is pretty convinced it's a girl, though. The names we have picked out are:
Sofia Addison Otts or
Jax Owen Otts
I would be really siked to use either of them.
I am glad that fall is peaking its head around the corner. I missed the cool weather.
Hope all is well.
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[15 Jul 2009|02:10am] |
Livejournal is gay, but for an updates sake:
I had my first ultrasound last Wednesday. They couldn't get a good measurement because the little things wouldn't stop flipping around. The lady said it looked like he/she was having a party. It looked like a shrimp. Cody couldn't stop smiling and i couldn't as well. The heartbeat was 180 which the nurse said means girl.
Uhhh... To be continued..
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[10 Jun 2009|02:24am] |
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Oh hey, I'm pregnant.
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[22 Apr 2009|03:25am] |
I went running tonight to get a feeling of freedom. The air was really cold hitting my bare legs and instruments were pounding heavily in my ears. Not too heavy, though-- I couldn't still hear my feet pounding the pavement everytime I took another step into the world. I felt like every footstep was a broken link to a chain of society. Money, Responsibility, Commitments: I was free. As my breathing got heavier along with the dramatic music I began to wonder if this all was for real. Could you run to freedom? Could you let your feet lift off into the unknown and diappear? I felt like I was doing just that. I took a corner into uncharted territory when I got an overpowering rush of energy. I wiped the sweat from my forehead and began to smile as I was making my break. I was going the distance and heading to the destination of opportunities and everything felt new.
And then I woke up.
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[14 Jan 2009|12:16am] |
We are like savages.
We tear into each other without remorse.
Only listening to our hearts. We need
this nourishment to survive.
We are like savages.
We bite into each others flesh relentlessly.
Breathing in the scent of one another;
Consuming each others drug.
We are like savages.
We stalk one another aimlessly and strategically
like a predator is drawn to its prey.
We are like savages.
Love makes us this way.
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| Tonight was a good night. |
[04 Jan 2009|04:24am] |
Even though we did our own things, tonight was great because I know I love you and that you love me back. You make me smile when I cry. And cry when I laugh. You know the right things to say even when you say the wrong ones. You are a part of me, and I'm a part of you. We are in this together, even if it is a sinking ship. You complete me. You were my 2008. Now be my 2009. Partner.
Me.
Us.
The World.
We.
Let's go to sleep.
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[18 Dec 2008|04:16am] |
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[10 Dec 2008|03:04am] |
I miss Clarksville.
I always feel like something is missing.
And I know it's all of you I left behind.
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[17 Nov 2008|05:08pm] |
I love the fact that when i go to write in here that it's all happy stuff. Even if I don't know what to type, things that I'm happy about flood from my mouth onto the screen.
I love this life that Cody and I are making for ourselves. I think we helped each other in a lot of ways deal with our lives. Like he makes me feel good. And makes me feel like he needs me around and would'nt do anything to lose me. And I think that I helped him grow up in a lot of ways. It's just a really healthy relationship. I think that all of my friends can vouch that my previous ones were pretty terrible, but this one is awesome!
Anyway-- I am so siked about Thanksgiving. I am so fat for saying it, but it's my favorite holiday. I can't wait for it. We are staying here and eating with my family for Thanksgiving. And Christmas day we will be with his family. It will be kind of crazy to see how somebody else celebrates Christmas, because I am so used to the way my family does it. My family gets really into it, and he says his does too so that makes me feel pretty excited.
Right now I am about to go to my cousin's first grade play where he is a turkey. I miss all of you a lot, and can't wait to see my Clarksville babies.
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[09 Nov 2008|05:26am] |
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I am absolutely, head over heels, retardedly, unexplainably, self-mutilating completely in love.
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| I stole this from Allie. |
[06 Oct 2008|02:47pm] |
1:: What are your middle names?
Ryan and Casey.
2:: How long have you been together?
A year next month.
3:: Do you have any children together?
Not at all.
4:: What about pets?
We don't.
5:: Do you have the same religious beliefs?
Mostly.
6:: Are you from the same hometown?
No, but we both live here now.
7:: Do you live in the same town now?
Yes, we live in the same apartment.
8:: Who is the smartest?
We are different in that aspect. Book smarts? Me.
9:: Who is the most sensitive?
Both of us.
10:: Where is the first place you went to eat as a couple?
Waffle house, I think.
11:: Do you wear matching clothes?
No. Two completely different styles.
12:: Where is the furthest you have traveled as a couple?
Not far.
13:: Who has the best group of friends?
I like my friends better. A lot of his friends used to use him for things before I came into the picture.
14:: Who has the craziest ex[es]?
Him.
15:: Who has the worst temper?
Him, definitely.
16:: Who does the cooking?
Me, mostly.
17:: Who's more social?
Myself.
18:: Who is the neat freak?
Both of us, at times.
19:: Who is the most affectionate?
Him.
20:: Who is the most stubborn?
I am.
22:: Who wakes up earlier?
Him, most of the time.
23:: Where was your first date?
I am not sure. I think we just watched movies.
24:: Who said "I Love You" first?
Him, but it was mutual.
25:: How soon did you have sex?
Soon.
26:: How did you spend your 1st year anniversary?
That is next month. And I am not sure.
27:: Who has the bigger family?
He does.
28:: Do you give/get flowers often?
He gives me flowers randomly, and I love it. Always different kinds.
29:: How do you spend the holidays?
With both of our families.
30:: Do you have any inside jokes?
Way too many.
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[10 Sep 2008|04:39am] |
I am finally going to Clarksville THIS weekend. I am so excited and I hope to see everyone.
I am so exhausted. Physically, mentally, and emotionally. These past few days I have been a wreck and broke up with Cody like three or four times because I am an asshole. Sometimes I think that he deserves someone way better than my crazy, jerk, of a human being. I swear I get so mad and feel so unhappy... But I can't imagine my life without him. I know that sounds so middle school to say, but it's true. He is part of my everyday routine. And he feels like home to me.
My life is spiraling in front of me, and I am hoping I find common ground soon. I feel dizzy and wish I knew what I wanted for myself, and my future. I do know one aspect: Cody.
Hahaha. I am gay.
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[22 Jul 2008|02:41pm] |
We moved into our apartment! I love it, even though it is still a mess.
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